Tuesday, November 14, 2006 at 12:12am
The end of enemy thinking
Column: All Paths
The past two weeks have been very difficult for me, not only as an interfaith minister but also as one who enjoys, honors and embraces diversity. You see, the midterm elections were the catalyst for some heated exchanges with friends and in my community in general. I am sure you know that any conversation about politics these days usually includes a discussion about religion and morals as well. It is difficult to extricate the two in today's political environment. It seems that during this period I was involved in my fair share of these exchanges.
I found one of these exchanges particularly troubling. One afternoon, after making the rounds in my community, having several conversations about politics and religion, I stopped by a friend's shop. After the usual greeting and discussion about the election, she began to talk about her church activities. She is very active in her church and extremely proud of the work she does there.
At one point in the conversation, she began to talk about the Bible and said, "The Bible is the great book, and it is the one that all other books will be judged by." After she made that statement, she looked at me as if she was waiting for me to affirm her statement. Then she asked me if I agreed with her.
Well, you should have seen her face when I said, "The Bible is one of many great books, such as the Koran, Torah, and Bhagavad-Gita and The Holy Granth, that contain divine revelations and guidance." She looked like she could faint. Then she asked, "Jay, I know you are a minister, but what kind of minister are you that you do not believe in the Bible?" I paused for a while, because I believed that this was a sincere question, and we are still getting to know each other better. So I wanted to give her my best answer.
When I collected my thoughts, I said to her: "I am an interfaith minister who honors all religious traditions and believes that no single book or religion can make an exclusive claim to the absolute truth as it relates to God. And that most religions and their texts contain some unique divine revelations and shared common truths as well."
After I said that, the conversation was no longer productive, because she kept quoting one Bible verse after another and implied basically that I would go hell if I did not change my views. Soon her tone became very judgmental and almost condemning.
This surprised me, because for the most part this woman is a good, decent and compassionate person. However, like many people, she refuses to honor the beliefs of others and accept that there just might be another point of view with some validity. Such people have no room for diversity. It's us against them or Christian against Muslim, Muslim against Jew, black vs. white, gay vs. straight, rich vs. poor, etc. In other words, if he or she doesn't look like me, worship like me, or vote like I vote, then he or she is absolutely wrong and I am absolutely right.
This need to be absolutely right is what divides communities and erects invisible walls of isolation. A stone wall will wither away with time. However, a wall built upon fear and ignorance can last forever. It is my deepest hope that I will not let my friend stay behind the wall that she is allowing to separate us. And believe me, she is trying her best to do that. I feel that it is part of my mission as an interfaith minister, as well as her friend, to tear down these walls and prevent more from being built.
There are many others working toward this end as well. I am going to stay in close contact with my friend the shop owner, and introduce her to other friends from various religious traditions who share her sense of community and other values. Hopefully, we will be able to show her that it is OK to have a different belief without being wrong. I am committed to building the friendship and not the wall. So I urge everyone who has a friend like the shop owner to remain committed to friendship, no matter how hard they try to build a wall between you. Please, we don't need any more walls.
— — —
Rev. Jay Speights is an interfaith minister and main United Nations representative for The New Seminary in New York. He has a master's degree in public policy. You can learn more about his work at the United Nations at The New Seminary website His email address is {email jayspeights@newseminary.org}jayspeights@newseminary.org{/email}. © copyright 2006 by Jay Speights
I found one of these exchanges particularly troubling. One afternoon, after making the rounds in my community, having several conversations about politics and religion, I stopped by a friend's shop. After the usual greeting and discussion about the election, she began to talk about her church activities. She is very active in her church and extremely proud of the work she does there.
At one point in the conversation, she began to talk about the Bible and said, "The Bible is the great book, and it is the one that all other books will be judged by." After she made that statement, she looked at me as if she was waiting for me to affirm her statement. Then she asked me if I agreed with her.
Well, you should have seen her face when I said, "The Bible is one of many great books, such as the Koran, Torah, and Bhagavad-Gita and The Holy Granth, that contain divine revelations and guidance." She looked like she could faint. Then she asked, "Jay, I know you are a minister, but what kind of minister are you that you do not believe in the Bible?" I paused for a while, because I believed that this was a sincere question, and we are still getting to know each other better. So I wanted to give her my best answer.
When I collected my thoughts, I said to her: "I am an interfaith minister who honors all religious traditions and believes that no single book or religion can make an exclusive claim to the absolute truth as it relates to God. And that most religions and their texts contain some unique divine revelations and shared common truths as well."
After I said that, the conversation was no longer productive, because she kept quoting one Bible verse after another and implied basically that I would go hell if I did not change my views. Soon her tone became very judgmental and almost condemning.
This surprised me, because for the most part this woman is a good, decent and compassionate person. However, like many people, she refuses to honor the beliefs of others and accept that there just might be another point of view with some validity. Such people have no room for diversity. It's us against them or Christian against Muslim, Muslim against Jew, black vs. white, gay vs. straight, rich vs. poor, etc. In other words, if he or she doesn't look like me, worship like me, or vote like I vote, then he or she is absolutely wrong and I am absolutely right.
This need to be absolutely right is what divides communities and erects invisible walls of isolation. A stone wall will wither away with time. However, a wall built upon fear and ignorance can last forever. It is my deepest hope that I will not let my friend stay behind the wall that she is allowing to separate us. And believe me, she is trying her best to do that. I feel that it is part of my mission as an interfaith minister, as well as her friend, to tear down these walls and prevent more from being built.
There are many others working toward this end as well. I am going to stay in close contact with my friend the shop owner, and introduce her to other friends from various religious traditions who share her sense of community and other values. Hopefully, we will be able to show her that it is OK to have a different belief without being wrong. I am committed to building the friendship and not the wall. So I urge everyone who has a friend like the shop owner to remain committed to friendship, no matter how hard they try to build a wall between you. Please, we don't need any more walls.
— — —
Rev. Jay Speights is an interfaith minister and main United Nations representative for The New Seminary in New York. He has a master's degree in public policy. You can learn more about his work at the United Nations at The New Seminary website His email address is {email jayspeights@newseminary.org}jayspeights@newseminary.org{/email}. © copyright 2006 by Jay Speights