By: Janet Conner

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Tuesday, February 20, 2007 at 1:01am

The answers are in the questions

Column: Writing Down Your Soul
When things are going swimmingly, we tend to keep doing what we're doing. Life appears to be working, and all is right with the world. There's little reflection, no judgment and certainly no change. But come heartache, worry, suffering, setbacks or fear, and suddenly we want things to change — and fast. We want answers. And we want them now.

Maybe it's Western medicine's fault. When we feel ill, we expect a pill or salve to restore us to health — the faster the better. Just a few years ago, if you were really under the weather, you were told to crawl in bed for a week, drink fluids and take antibiotics for 10 days to two weeks. Now, doctors pass out "super" antibiotics: Take one pill a day for just five days — sometimes even three. You're back on your feet overnight. In our world, there is simply no time to be sick.

In our 24/7 world, we allocate even less time for psychological, emotional or spiritual recovery. Not happy? Read a magazine article and you, too, will know the "Seven Steps to Complete and Total Joy!" Exhausted? No problem. Eat this perfect mega-food; take this ultra maxi-vitamin; do this super-duper cleanse. Swallow something and all shall be well. Worried about your job? No problem. Find another online. Lonely? Don't cry. Find a mate in a month without leaving your laptop. Want to meet your soul mate in person? Problem solved. You can meet 10 people during your lunch break in five-minute "speed dates." Whatever the problem, we seek a fast — and hopefully cheap — solution.

But when your soul aches and your heart hurts, there may be no instant solution. Yes, prayer relieves your burden. Yes, meditation relaxes your body and your mind. Yes, there are many, many things you can do to feel relief in the moment. But, if a few hours later, a day later, a month later, the problem is still there, eating away at your composure and your confidence, it's a signal to go deeper. It's a clue that you want more, need more and are entitled to more. You want answers, all right, but you want personal, focused answers — answers that will make a real difference in your life.

Chasing answers with quick fixes just doesn't seem to work. Somehow the more you chase, the more elusive those answers become. To add insult to injury, when you're in this state, it always seems that everyone else has found "the" answer and is living a happy, prosperous life. They're not, of course, but it sure can look and feel that way.

If you find yourself in that frustrating place, shift your mental gears 180 degrees. Stop looking "out there" for the perfect answer. Instead, turn inside and start looking for the diametric opposite of answers. Stop seeking answers and start asking questions.

Does that sound a bit backward? Well, here's a little secret: The answers are in the questions. That's where they live. You can't get your right answers until you ask your right questions. It's like finding the right key for the door, or the exact combination for the Swiss bank vault, or the correct pronunciation for the abracadabra phrase that releases the magic.

Questions are your entrance to the real game — the spiritual game of life. Only it isn't a game of numbers and chance; it's a game of questions.

And it's really quite simple. You sit with a notepad, and you start a written conversation with the source of all answers — God. Doesn't matter what you call this God, just set the intention to connect with the God of your heart. Then, start telling God what's happening in your life. Once you've told your story, start asking your questions. Watch what happens. One question is answered by another question, which triggers another question; the next thing you know, you have pages of conversation, much of it questions.

And you notice something interesting: You start out with a pretty straightforward "Why is this happening?" sort of question. But as the pages turn, the questions get richer and deeper. It's as if they have a life of their own. They zig this way, then they zag that way. One leads to another, and to another, and to another, until you realize you're asking questions you have never asked before. You stop and wonder, "Where did THAT come from?" You know where it didn't come from. It didn't come from you. You've never asked yourself anything like that.

Well, hooray for you. You're now on new territory, exploring new ground, discovering parts of your soul you didn't know existed. Celebrate, because you are getting warmer — much, much warmer.

The key is to keep going. Keep asking, keep exploring. The great spiritual traditions all honor this kind of mystical exploration in partnership with the great divine. But until now, we've assumed it was a deep, difficult practice requiring years of preparation. It isn't difficult, and you can start right now, with only a pen and paper and the desire to begin. Dialogue with God requires only a sacred intention and a heart willing to hear the truth and follow it.

The biggest question of all is: "Is there a final question, THE question, the perfect question that ends the exploration and produces the perfect answer?" I don't know. I certainly haven't found it. I find that the questions are all so interesting, so provocative, that I can't imagine one being THE ultimate, the final, the end.

That means I haven't found THE answer either. But I'm perfectly OK with that. I'm enjoying the dialogue so much, I don't want it to end. I'll just keep having these conversations with God and see where the questions lead us. Wherever it is, it's good.

(Next week: God's only job)

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Janet Conner, S.E. (Spiritual Explorer), is the author of the Spiritual Geography series and is currently writing "Dear God: The Conversation That Changes Everything." The Spiritual Geography books are available through Amazon or Spiritual Geography. Reach Janet at {email janetconner@tampabay.rr.com}janetconner@tampabay.rr.com{/email}.© copyright 2007 by Janet Conner