Thursday, October 25, 2007 at 2:02am
The spiritual crisis of aging
Column: Spiritual Psychology
In 1900 age 50 was the average life expectancy in the United States. Today it's 78 and climbing — that's more than a 50 percent increase. The fastest growing age group is 80 plus, with many baby boomers expected to live to the 90s and beyond. By midcentury hundred-year lifespans will be commonplace. Despite prospects for longer and healthier lives, the fear of aging is rampant.
It often erupts at age 30 when the mirror starts talking back. An ad for anti-wrinkle products on AOL just this week says, "Fighting Age — It Begins in Your 20s and 30s." The war on aging heats up at 40 and spreads like wildfire after 50. Experts point to psychological and sociological factors including anxiety, if not terror, about physical changes, role changes and loss of identity, a youth-worshiping society, disappointments and regrets, fear of physical death, and a host of other related concerns. What has been overlooked, though, is the spiritual crisis that aging evokes — which is the real underpinning of the crisis of aging.
In my book "Escape Your Own Prison: Why We Need Spirituality and Psychology to be Truly Free," Chapter Six, "The Spiritual Emergency of Aging," explores the interface of aging and spirituality. My "Thirty Plus Survival Kit" offers the understandings and tools to surmount the crisis of aging. Here are a few excerpts from the chapter that speak to the hidden spiritual emergency of aging:
"Birds do it, bees do it, and even kings, queens, presidents, popes, and billionaires do it! They all age and die. But don't tell that to the baby boomers. The huge 77 million strong post World War II generation (born between 1946 and 1964) seems to believe that the fate of all creatures on the planet will not happen to them. Bigger and better ego driven strategies, they think, will bring them to the proverbial fountain of youth that eluded fifteenth century Spanish explorer Ponce de Leon (although he did discover Florida). This upbeat generation of aging adults that are beginning to cross the senior line are fighting back. They have declared war on aging.
"Their strategy is to whip the ego into action, believing that the aging horse can continue to jump through the same old hoops. And American industry and corporate America has been quick to feed the youth frenzy. Just read the headlines and captions in popular magazines: 'Stop Aging Now, Beat the Clock, Reverse Aging, Stay Young Forever, Erase Wrinkles, Create the Age You Want to Be,' and the best one: 'Cure aging,' as if it were a disease.
"To fulfill the promise of 'young forever' there are the spas where you can fight the clock with miracle herbs, hormones, secret formulas, crash diets, intestinal cleansing and detoxification, intensive exercise, yoga postures, breathing exercises, hair transplants, breast implants, breast reductions, tummy tucks, other cosmetic surgeries, and endless practices and procedures to win the age war — desperate egos in a life and death struggle to survive intact and unchanged."
And: "The crisis of aging is basically a crisis of the ego. The ego is a TIME BOMB. Ego consciousness or personal 'ME' consciousness breaks down with aging. Aging, marked by time, is the archenemy of the ego. The ego doesn't comfortably accept limitations, let alone decline and death. Remember, the ego is driven by the assumption of an independent separate me rooted to me experiences and dedicated to growth, development, and expansion to achieve security and mastery of the environment. The ego's mantra is all about personal power and invulnerability. It lives in a linear world moving from past to future barely touching the present moment. The package of past, present and future is essential for sustaining the ego's illusory sense of a concrete entity. What could be more real than a me that has a history, a presence, and extension into the future? The future is particularly vital to the ego's survival — that's where its grandiose goal of wholeness and immortality will be achieved. Then clock time runs down threatening to puncture the ego balloon. Where can an expansive ego turn as its forward movement slows with the prospect of stalling, or worse, coming to a halt?"
And: "An inert ego stuck in the present with no substantial future is a dead ego. In the 'now' moment the ego must squarely face the deficits it has always assumed to be its nature — and doesn't like it. Worse is the scary feeling of not enough time to fix it. That's why the ego will run helter-skelter from the 'now,' into the future. Incompleteness 'now' is tolerable only if there is movement toward a fantasy of future rescue. Where can the ego turn to fulfill its lifelong mission in a world without the crutch of time? 'If I am not lodged in the here and now and the future is fading, the only other familiar haunt I know is the past. So I'll jiggle the past in an effort to jump-start the old engine.' Dwelling on past successes can offer some solace. But that past has nowhere to go — it is no longer a springboard to the future. From the ego's perspective, aging tarnishes the prospects for golden days ahead. The very foundation of its existence is challenged as it loses its grip on time."
And another: "Most of us are senselessly whiplashed by time. How would your life change if you dropped out of time — eliminated it from your mental vocabulary? In a timeless world where only 'now' is real, there's time for everything. Do you yearn to embrace the 'now'? If so, you must first shake off the grip of time. Later we will visit some everyday activities and decisions in a timeless world where only 'now' is real to learn about the value of dropping out of time when it doesn't serve us."
The spiritual perspective makes it clear that the crisis of aging is the ego meeting its Armageddon — the end of clock time.
More on that next week.
— — —
In case you missed the last few related columns:
"Spirituality + psychology = a powerful duo"
"Ego: An object that cannot change"
"To ego or not to ego, that's a question?"
"If you saw the truth, would you go for it?"
And, "Escaping the prison of the self"
— — —
(My book "Escape Your Own Prison: Why We Need Spirituality and Psychology to be Truly Free" is now available at Amazon.com, Barnes & Noble.com and other major book outlets.)
— — —
Bernard Starr, Ph.D., formerly professor of developmental and educational psychology at the City University of New York, now teaches "Spirituality in Film" and leads "The Spiritual Forum" at Marymount Manhattan College. In addition to his work in radio, he is a longtime contributor of commentary and opinion articles to numerous major publications. He is also the main United Nations representative for the Institute of Global Education that founded the Mucherla Global School in Mucherla, India. His book "Escape Your Own Prison: Why We Need Spirituality and Psychology to be Truly Free" has been published by Rowman & Littlefield. He can be reached at {email OmniCns@aol.com}OmniCns@aol.com{/email}. © Copyright 2007 by Bernard Starr.
It often erupts at age 30 when the mirror starts talking back. An ad for anti-wrinkle products on AOL just this week says, "Fighting Age — It Begins in Your 20s and 30s." The war on aging heats up at 40 and spreads like wildfire after 50. Experts point to psychological and sociological factors including anxiety, if not terror, about physical changes, role changes and loss of identity, a youth-worshiping society, disappointments and regrets, fear of physical death, and a host of other related concerns. What has been overlooked, though, is the spiritual crisis that aging evokes — which is the real underpinning of the crisis of aging.
In my book "Escape Your Own Prison: Why We Need Spirituality and Psychology to be Truly Free," Chapter Six, "The Spiritual Emergency of Aging," explores the interface of aging and spirituality. My "Thirty Plus Survival Kit" offers the understandings and tools to surmount the crisis of aging. Here are a few excerpts from the chapter that speak to the hidden spiritual emergency of aging:
"Birds do it, bees do it, and even kings, queens, presidents, popes, and billionaires do it! They all age and die. But don't tell that to the baby boomers. The huge 77 million strong post World War II generation (born between 1946 and 1964) seems to believe that the fate of all creatures on the planet will not happen to them. Bigger and better ego driven strategies, they think, will bring them to the proverbial fountain of youth that eluded fifteenth century Spanish explorer Ponce de Leon (although he did discover Florida). This upbeat generation of aging adults that are beginning to cross the senior line are fighting back. They have declared war on aging.
"Their strategy is to whip the ego into action, believing that the aging horse can continue to jump through the same old hoops. And American industry and corporate America has been quick to feed the youth frenzy. Just read the headlines and captions in popular magazines: 'Stop Aging Now, Beat the Clock, Reverse Aging, Stay Young Forever, Erase Wrinkles, Create the Age You Want to Be,' and the best one: 'Cure aging,' as if it were a disease.
"To fulfill the promise of 'young forever' there are the spas where you can fight the clock with miracle herbs, hormones, secret formulas, crash diets, intestinal cleansing and detoxification, intensive exercise, yoga postures, breathing exercises, hair transplants, breast implants, breast reductions, tummy tucks, other cosmetic surgeries, and endless practices and procedures to win the age war — desperate egos in a life and death struggle to survive intact and unchanged."
And: "The crisis of aging is basically a crisis of the ego. The ego is a TIME BOMB. Ego consciousness or personal 'ME' consciousness breaks down with aging. Aging, marked by time, is the archenemy of the ego. The ego doesn't comfortably accept limitations, let alone decline and death. Remember, the ego is driven by the assumption of an independent separate me rooted to me experiences and dedicated to growth, development, and expansion to achieve security and mastery of the environment. The ego's mantra is all about personal power and invulnerability. It lives in a linear world moving from past to future barely touching the present moment. The package of past, present and future is essential for sustaining the ego's illusory sense of a concrete entity. What could be more real than a me that has a history, a presence, and extension into the future? The future is particularly vital to the ego's survival — that's where its grandiose goal of wholeness and immortality will be achieved. Then clock time runs down threatening to puncture the ego balloon. Where can an expansive ego turn as its forward movement slows with the prospect of stalling, or worse, coming to a halt?"
And: "An inert ego stuck in the present with no substantial future is a dead ego. In the 'now' moment the ego must squarely face the deficits it has always assumed to be its nature — and doesn't like it. Worse is the scary feeling of not enough time to fix it. That's why the ego will run helter-skelter from the 'now,' into the future. Incompleteness 'now' is tolerable only if there is movement toward a fantasy of future rescue. Where can the ego turn to fulfill its lifelong mission in a world without the crutch of time? 'If I am not lodged in the here and now and the future is fading, the only other familiar haunt I know is the past. So I'll jiggle the past in an effort to jump-start the old engine.' Dwelling on past successes can offer some solace. But that past has nowhere to go — it is no longer a springboard to the future. From the ego's perspective, aging tarnishes the prospects for golden days ahead. The very foundation of its existence is challenged as it loses its grip on time."
And another: "Most of us are senselessly whiplashed by time. How would your life change if you dropped out of time — eliminated it from your mental vocabulary? In a timeless world where only 'now' is real, there's time for everything. Do you yearn to embrace the 'now'? If so, you must first shake off the grip of time. Later we will visit some everyday activities and decisions in a timeless world where only 'now' is real to learn about the value of dropping out of time when it doesn't serve us."
The spiritual perspective makes it clear that the crisis of aging is the ego meeting its Armageddon — the end of clock time.
More on that next week.
— — —
In case you missed the last few related columns:
"Spirituality + psychology = a powerful duo"
"Ego: An object that cannot change"
"To ego or not to ego, that's a question?"
"If you saw the truth, would you go for it?"
And, "Escaping the prison of the self"
— — —
(My book "Escape Your Own Prison: Why We Need Spirituality and Psychology to be Truly Free" is now available at Amazon.com, Barnes & Noble.com and other major book outlets.)
— — —
Bernard Starr, Ph.D., formerly professor of developmental and educational psychology at the City University of New York, now teaches "Spirituality in Film" and leads "The Spiritual Forum" at Marymount Manhattan College. In addition to his work in radio, he is a longtime contributor of commentary and opinion articles to numerous major publications. He is also the main United Nations representative for the Institute of Global Education that founded the Mucherla Global School in Mucherla, India. His book "Escape Your Own Prison: Why We Need Spirituality and Psychology to be Truly Free" has been published by Rowman & Littlefield. He can be reached at {email OmniCns@aol.com}OmniCns@aol.com{/email}. © Copyright 2007 by Bernard Starr.