Tuesday, January 15, 2008 at 1:01am
Freedom from want - your path to fulfillment
Column: PERFECTBALANCELIFE
If you live each moment without any need or want, you are truly blessed. Is this possible? Are you able, right now, to say to yourself that you have all that you need and that you are content and at peace? If you can answer yes to this question, you are experiencing life to the fullest. If not, then I'd like to encourage you to consider putting on a different pair of eyeglasses in order to see anew what actually already IS.
Here is the truth: Right at this moment God is providing for you all that is necessary so you can face and handle each and every challenge to the very best of your ability. From this perspective, there is no time for worry or frustration, is there? Why, then, do we often seem to feel ill-at-ease and anxious? It is because we are seeking our own advantage. If we are more concerned with our own well-being at the expense of another, we can never be at peace in such moments.
In the Bible we are told that love covers all mistakes (Proverbs 10:12). Said another way, if we are always practicing the lifestyle of wanting to help and be of assistance to others, we will be able to transcend our own errors and those of others. By transcendence I mean the capacity to move beyond the limits of what we see and experience in a given moment. For example, at my workplace I observe disorder with my eyes and hear conflict with my ears. Yet, this is not all that I see. Rather, I see with my mind and feel with my heart an opportunity to create harmony and teamwork. This kind of "seeing" is connected with a power not limited by time or space — the power of love.
Recently during a dinner with a good friend of mine, I suddenly felt compelled to share with him about an experience I had earlier in the day while walking at our local park. During my walk I began to pray while taking in the beautiful scenic view of the Hudson River, and the following statement flashed into my consciousness: God has already given everything to me that I have ever desired or needed. My life is complete and fulfilled. I was suddenly struck with an overwhelming feeling of gratitude and thankfulness. Such moments make life worth living, truly.
My wife constantly reminds me about the small things I do that demonstrate to her I am often not being considerate and concerned enough about others. Sometimes I graciously receive her remarks, but at other times I am offended and get upset. When I am able to step back and reflect on these situations, I can see that I am being lazy or inconsiderate. I see that my attitude and approach to life is more about how I feel and what I want to do in a given moment.
Just last night my wife asked me to get on the computer and pay some bills. I felt like lying down on the sofa and watching television for a few minutes. A few minutes turned into three hours, and then I just went to bed. This is one small example of how we can bring tension into our relationships by not fully considering the requests and needs of others. I wanted something in a given moment more than considering the perspective of my wife.
I think that when we are in a state of gratitude and thankfulness, we are able to readily meet the needs of others who are asking for our help. When we allow ourselves to feel and think that something in our life is lacking, we tend to tighten up our view of ourselves and others, and this can cause tension and conflict. By cultivating a spirit of being free from want, we are able to open ourselves up more fully to what life is offering to us each and every moment. Let's practice this perspective a little more every day. By doing so, I believe we are walking the spiritual path with grace and strength.
Jack LaValley is a practitioner of the martial arts, physical cultivation exercises, and sitting meditation. Although currently working in the hospitality industry, he spends much of his free time helping and working together with those who are pursuing the spiritual path. Jack and his wife, Wha-ja Oh-LaValley, a native of South Korea, reside in Westchester County, New York, and are the proud parents of three beautiful children. Jack is completing his book manuscript, "A Perfectly Balanced Life: Living Each Day with Wisdom and Strength," and expects publication to be in October 2008. You can reach Jack at: perfectbalance1@optimum.net © Copyright 2008 by Jack LaValley.
Here is the truth: Right at this moment God is providing for you all that is necessary so you can face and handle each and every challenge to the very best of your ability. From this perspective, there is no time for worry or frustration, is there? Why, then, do we often seem to feel ill-at-ease and anxious? It is because we are seeking our own advantage. If we are more concerned with our own well-being at the expense of another, we can never be at peace in such moments.
In the Bible we are told that love covers all mistakes (Proverbs 10:12). Said another way, if we are always practicing the lifestyle of wanting to help and be of assistance to others, we will be able to transcend our own errors and those of others. By transcendence I mean the capacity to move beyond the limits of what we see and experience in a given moment. For example, at my workplace I observe disorder with my eyes and hear conflict with my ears. Yet, this is not all that I see. Rather, I see with my mind and feel with my heart an opportunity to create harmony and teamwork. This kind of "seeing" is connected with a power not limited by time or space — the power of love.
Recently during a dinner with a good friend of mine, I suddenly felt compelled to share with him about an experience I had earlier in the day while walking at our local park. During my walk I began to pray while taking in the beautiful scenic view of the Hudson River, and the following statement flashed into my consciousness: God has already given everything to me that I have ever desired or needed. My life is complete and fulfilled. I was suddenly struck with an overwhelming feeling of gratitude and thankfulness. Such moments make life worth living, truly.
My wife constantly reminds me about the small things I do that demonstrate to her I am often not being considerate and concerned enough about others. Sometimes I graciously receive her remarks, but at other times I am offended and get upset. When I am able to step back and reflect on these situations, I can see that I am being lazy or inconsiderate. I see that my attitude and approach to life is more about how I feel and what I want to do in a given moment.
Just last night my wife asked me to get on the computer and pay some bills. I felt like lying down on the sofa and watching television for a few minutes. A few minutes turned into three hours, and then I just went to bed. This is one small example of how we can bring tension into our relationships by not fully considering the requests and needs of others. I wanted something in a given moment more than considering the perspective of my wife.
I think that when we are in a state of gratitude and thankfulness, we are able to readily meet the needs of others who are asking for our help. When we allow ourselves to feel and think that something in our life is lacking, we tend to tighten up our view of ourselves and others, and this can cause tension and conflict. By cultivating a spirit of being free from want, we are able to open ourselves up more fully to what life is offering to us each and every moment. Let's practice this perspective a little more every day. By doing so, I believe we are walking the spiritual path with grace and strength.
Jack LaValley is a practitioner of the martial arts, physical cultivation exercises, and sitting meditation. Although currently working in the hospitality industry, he spends much of his free time helping and working together with those who are pursuing the spiritual path. Jack and his wife, Wha-ja Oh-LaValley, a native of South Korea, reside in Westchester County, New York, and are the proud parents of three beautiful children. Jack is completing his book manuscript, "A Perfectly Balanced Life: Living Each Day with Wisdom and Strength," and expects publication to be in October 2008. You can reach Jack at: perfectbalance1@optimum.net © Copyright 2008 by Jack LaValley.