Thursday, February 28, 2008 at 1:01am
What do you really need?
Column: Unclutter Your Life
I spoke with a friend who just started a new job she doesn't like. She really wants to start her own business doing something she's very good at and enjoys. It's not a matter of figuring out what it may be; she already knows and has done it in the past.
During our conversation, she wanted to get into the "story" of how the woman who is supposed to train her doesn't want to teach her anything. My response was, "That makes sense ... because you don't want to learn it. Let go of how she behaves. It's just a part of the fact that you're not where you want to be or doing what you want to do."
Then she started telling me about how she's a certain age and what happens to people when they reach a certain age. I stopped her mid-comment and said, "What about instead of stating why your age is involved, you say that you choose to do the work you prefer? How does that feel?" She did get that instead of justifying why she doesn't want a regular job, she's allowed to say she has a different vision and intention for her life.
We discussed the ad she used years ago that triggered 21 potential clients to call her in two days. She was concerned that the ad wasn't good enough. I said, "What if the ad not only ignites the same response, but people see your ad and get excited to see you're back in business?"
We went back and forth for a while; and though she continued to shift her energy into a positive direction, old patterns of behavior kept creeping in — which is something that happens to all of us. And she started to express the concerns many people have about getting everything perfect and aligned before she got started. I asked if her pen and paper were still handy, since she'd been taking notes, and I asked her to write down the following quote from Mike Litman:
"You don't have to get it right; you just have to get it going."
She laughed out loud when I said it. No matter how much planning we do to start a business or project of any size, we're going to have to adjust and tweak as we go along. And that's an ongoing process if we do our business well. We also talked about the fact that "can't" is a dirty word whereas "won't" may be accurate.
Another excellent quote I gave her is from Kurt Wright: "Commitment is a magnet." If she's as committed to doing this business as she says she is, she'll attract the right people, right jobs and right ideas. That's simply how the Law of Attraction works. If she says it can't happen or it's difficult, she'll get that, as well.
What we really need in regard to any area of our lives is the attitude, focus, vision, appreciation, feeling, commitment and passion to make it happen. And, it helps if we choose to enjoy the ride.
— — —
Joyce Shafer is a life empowerment coach and author of "I Don't Want to be Your Guru, but I Have Something to Say" as well as "How to Have What You Really Want" and contributor of articles to various publications. She's also a free-lance proofreader, editor and ghost re-writer for fiction and non-fiction writers. Shafer can be emailed at {email jls1422@yahoo.com}jls1422@yahoo.com {/email}. © Copyright 2008 by Joyce Shafer.
During our conversation, she wanted to get into the "story" of how the woman who is supposed to train her doesn't want to teach her anything. My response was, "That makes sense ... because you don't want to learn it. Let go of how she behaves. It's just a part of the fact that you're not where you want to be or doing what you want to do."
Then she started telling me about how she's a certain age and what happens to people when they reach a certain age. I stopped her mid-comment and said, "What about instead of stating why your age is involved, you say that you choose to do the work you prefer? How does that feel?" She did get that instead of justifying why she doesn't want a regular job, she's allowed to say she has a different vision and intention for her life.
We discussed the ad she used years ago that triggered 21 potential clients to call her in two days. She was concerned that the ad wasn't good enough. I said, "What if the ad not only ignites the same response, but people see your ad and get excited to see you're back in business?"
We went back and forth for a while; and though she continued to shift her energy into a positive direction, old patterns of behavior kept creeping in — which is something that happens to all of us. And she started to express the concerns many people have about getting everything perfect and aligned before she got started. I asked if her pen and paper were still handy, since she'd been taking notes, and I asked her to write down the following quote from Mike Litman:
"You don't have to get it right; you just have to get it going."
She laughed out loud when I said it. No matter how much planning we do to start a business or project of any size, we're going to have to adjust and tweak as we go along. And that's an ongoing process if we do our business well. We also talked about the fact that "can't" is a dirty word whereas "won't" may be accurate.
Another excellent quote I gave her is from Kurt Wright: "Commitment is a magnet." If she's as committed to doing this business as she says she is, she'll attract the right people, right jobs and right ideas. That's simply how the Law of Attraction works. If she says it can't happen or it's difficult, she'll get that, as well.
What we really need in regard to any area of our lives is the attitude, focus, vision, appreciation, feeling, commitment and passion to make it happen. And, it helps if we choose to enjoy the ride.
— — —
Joyce Shafer is a life empowerment coach and author of "I Don't Want to be Your Guru, but I Have Something to Say" as well as "How to Have What You Really Want" and contributor of articles to various publications. She's also a free-lance proofreader, editor and ghost re-writer for fiction and non-fiction writers. Shafer can be emailed at {email jls1422@yahoo.com}jls1422@yahoo.com {/email}. © Copyright 2008 by Joyce Shafer.