One of my high school teachers would stand in front of the classroom with her arms crossed over her ample bosom and say, “Lordy, Lordy, Lordy, girls” as she shook her head in sheer fatigue and disbelief at the utter craziness that emerged from our adolescent brains.

What could have induced this vision of decades gone by? Why would I remember such a scene? I had not time-travelled back to high school, nor was I struggling with a geometry theorem.

What brought me to that moment was this: I had made plane reservations. Have you done that recently?

It’s a bit like a game show, press this button, and you can have the option of more leg room.

“That’s right, folks.” Cue the music. “We are offering four more inches of luxurious leg room in our main cabin. Imagine what it will feel like as you soar above the clouds. See yourself taking a full, deep breath as your fellow passengers hyperventilate all the way to the west coast. Relax your knees; they no longer have to stay under your chin. Your legs and feet will eschew the needles-and-pins feeling of no circulation. You have four more of the most elongated, spacious inches available in aviation today.”

The possibilities dance before my eyes. Maybe I will cross my ankles. Clearly, my math classes have not been wasted; I press the correct button and choose the roomier seating. But wait; do you hear that warning buzzer?

“Yes, folks, you can have the extra inches, but you have to pay to play. It can all be yours for the tiny surcharge of $30 for each (ahem) leg of your journey.”

Tick, tock, tick, tock … what to choose? Do I go crunched or uncrunched? One way or both ways? Add that $60 to the pricier-than-usual ticket, along with fuel surcharges and, Good God, what if I take a suitcase; what if I get hungry or thirsty? The list of fees gets longer and longer. The numbers seem bigger than ever. And this was my bargain flight.

I do the math, and I make my choice. In the back of my mind, I fear I might be a tad uncharitable to my fellow passengers lounging in their bountiful four inches. They will not look like me. They will be elegant and serene as they walk down the aisle to exit the plane.

I, on the other hand, will be red-faced as I jump up and down hoping to restore feeling in my legs, wake up my sleepy feet, unpretzel my body and do a free-standing Hokey Pokey to uncrimp my squished backside. And that is all before I reach for my bag in the overhead and get clunked in the head.

Ahhhh….the pleasures of air travel in today’s world. It is a veritable Pandora’s Box chock-a-block with squirming anti-terrorist restrictions; extra gooey and oozing layers of security; erupting and bloated fuel prices; and airline tear-stained bottom lines and crumpled P&L statements.

We, passengers, are frustrated and reeling; we march through the terminals like bleary-eyed extras from The Night of the Zombies. We have been traveling for what seems like days. We’re lucky to get to the airport on time, much less remember to pack food, bring our own headsets and make sure our liquid carry-ons do not exceed three ounces. We have packed and unpacked our suitcases, weighing our options, weighing our luggage.

Talk about fatigue, disbelief and utter craziness – and that is just getting through security.

So, here’s an option for you, my fellow traveler. Now, you can breathe out the old, and breathe in the new. You can convert the trials and tribulations of air travel into a new philosophy. Higher consciousness teacher Eckhart Tolle talked about A New Earth. May I suggest A New Sky?

Let us be in the here and now, let us take advantage of every opportunity that is presented by air travel.

Shall we begin?

Allow yourself to get settled into your comfy coach cushion, which has been flattened by any number of dimpled derrieres over the years. Find the right groove and settle in. Unlike Bette Davis who assured us in one classic movie, “Fasten your seatbelts, it’s going to be a bumpy ride,” air pockets notwithstanding, we are going for the Zen of it.

The cushion may be lumpy, but your attitude is one of smooth sailing all the way to your destination – despite the possibilities of a weather delay, air space congestion, a 45 minute queue for take-off, and no gate ready to receive you when you do land. You are prepared: you are ready for A New Sky.

Breathe out stale, recycled air. Breathe in the fragrant aroma of the hot pastrami sandwich from the fellow in 5D. Not only do your nostrils feel alive and awake; you also get virtual nourishment.

Breathe out tightness and tension as you stretch your arms. Breathe in more relaxation as your neighbor looks like she is fast asleep since your elbow connected with the side of her head. Breathe deeply; it looks to be a quiet flight, no overly chatty row companion. You can settle into your New Sky zone.

Breathe out worry, panic and time concerns. Breathe in the now of this New Sky moment. Remember time is an illusion, and Aunt Minnie’s surprise 100th birthday party is happening in several parallel realities. She won’t miss you, her favorite relative to whom she was planning to bequeath her fortune.

Breathe out the fear that your suitcase has gone MIA. Breathe in the notion that you are choosing to travel light. Who needs the dress for the party, the suit for the interview or the clothes for the funeral? You will practice detachment when you wear your Jimmy Kimmel tee shirt and raggedy shorts to meet the new district manager. It’s all A New Sky.

There, don’t you feel better? Hasn’t A New Sky elevated you to a place of deeper breathing and greater perspective? Haven’t you unclenched your jaw? Haven’t you ceased muttering to anyone who would listen that lip gloss is not a liquid? Haven’t you found, and furiously inhaled, the furry breath mint in the bottom of your knapsack?

Ahhhh…..A New Sky, awakening to the depths of air travel.


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Dr. Adele Ryan McDowell, Ph.D., is a psychologist, empath, and shaman who likes looking at life with the big viewfinder. Her website is www.channeledgrace.com; her e-mail address is channeledgrace@aol.com. © copyright 2008 by Adele Ryan McDowell